Day 14: In Chapter Eleven, I share some of my experiences in group therapy. Talk about your own experience with therapy…what it has taught you, how it has helped (or not helped) you, how it has helped you see how ENOUGH you are. If you’ve never been to therapy, talk about why. And what you would hope to learn from it if you ever went.
you can join the challenge with me by clicking the image on the left
I have a few therapy stories now, my first story was to start marriage counseling with my ex-husband it was not a positive session for our marriage, for the simple fact that he lied through the entire therapy session. If you’re going to go into counseling or if you’re going to do therapy one of the most important factors that I realize you have to do is you have to be vulnerable you have to be open to your actual session otherwise, one you’re throwing money out the window and to it is not really helping your growth it’s not really helping you expand to be a better person whatsoever and I think that was one of the things that I realize with him especially even to this day. I don’t think he will hold himself accountable for a whole lot of things that have happened with the demise of our marriage I unfortunately had to do that alone ,I had to realize what I did wrong and the reason for the ending of my marriage .Our marriage ended technically 2015 and he still has not held himself accountable from our brief conversations that we’ve had.
The second therapy session that I had with him was during the time that I had actually check myself into a mental health facility. One of the reasons why was because of the infidelities in our marriage on his side. One of the many questions that the therapist asked him was do you think you can stop cheating ? do you think that you can be all in in this marriage? do you think that you can stop hurting Kay and his response was should have been the moment I should have walked away (I did eventually, I walked away after I had our daughter) it was in that moment that he said he didn’t know if he could do that that was honestly very telling even though I left him we reconciled a year later and then we stayed together for a year to only a separate a year later .
Now my third session that was actually with Marcus had took an opportunity to live in Florida so he actually asked me to uproot my children’s lives away from their father to move to Florida for this opportunity for a chance with the Wounded Warrior Project he was trying to make a better life for himself .Marcus had a tendency to not be able to just graduate college he couldn’t hold a steady job there are a lot of things that he was suffering from that had a lot to do with his PTSD so the Wounded Warrior Project has a program for disabled vets that will assist them with finding a job ,getting an education and basically help them live a life as a normal civilian again .They pay for your school, they pay a stipend it’s a great opportunity, so I was trying to be supportive I went out there and I attended therapy with him . The therapist thought it would be a good idea to have me attend a session so he was attending sessions by himself for a while and then it got to a point where I begin to attend the sessions with him so the first two sessions were getting to know who I was, the second was getting to know our relationship .The third session that we had he actually didn’t show up to it and we had got into a fight that week and he didn’t want to discuss the fight in the therapy session. One of the things that the therapist had asked us to do is if we were to get into an argument or fight pause the fight and wait till therapy session to talk it out and hash it out there which I was doing that . He didn’t show up but thought it was better to call into the therapy session and speak on speakerphone and he didn’t want to speak to me at all he hung up because he got angry about the conversation and how it’s going because he felt like the therapist was not siding with him and he felt like she should since her fees we’re being covered by Wounded Warrior Project ,one of the things that resonated with me was that she told me was you need to get away from him and you need to get away from him very quickly where you are and your mental health is not where he is in his mental health about three weeks later after that I left Marcus and moved back to Texas.