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3 times I officially Lost myself in my 20’s and I didn’t find myself again until my 30th birthday. My losing myself always had a man somewhere far off in the distance. I had goals things I wanted to accomplish in life but the man I decided to marry and have children with didn’t want my dreams and goals to flourish and instead of standing up for myself and waking up at that moment I waited 8 years and after two children to find myself. I thought to find myself was to get in a relationship with a man 6 years younger than me and not even halfway done cooking in the oven. This man was insecure ,jealous of my children ,and wanted to be put first above everything and all things and to add insult to injury refused to pay bills and loved to keep his hands on me. I left him to find my stronger self or so I thought and I couldn’t have been anymore vulnerable When I met the man that changed the whole Mindset of myself , my mothering and the reason I started this blog. I hit rock bottom as far as emotions go when I was with Marcus for 3 years He was a verbal abuser . He lived for demeaning others which after leaving the relationship it was because he wasn’t happy with who he was as a man . Go figure people who are unhappy hurt other people who would have thought .
I found myself the most with him since the experience taught me that I needed to step back and find myself and think about what I wanted from life, and the next guy I want in my life. I learned over the last 3 years my deal breakers and what is important to me if I wanted someone in my life to compliment it . 33 year old Kay is more open I have divested and a total revamp of 18 year old Kay and I am forever grateful for losing myself several times to find myself the one time it was very important.