Few mistakes I made in my marriage with money were:
not setting up a budget for our household
not save for when it was time to end
I know how that sounds, it’s like a bad idea to already think of leaving when you are married but my mother has been married for 34 years and she always told me every woman should have mad Money. I had no clue what she meant until I was mad and broke and wanted to leave my ex-husband. As a woman, we should make enough to pay bills, have some in savings for a rainy day and have another savings for when we get mad. My friend would joke with me that I was using my mad money to set aside just in case it is needed for bail lol. My ex and I had separate and joint accounts I think with the mistakes we both made I would always have a separate account from the future person I am with. I am working (Lots of blogs on this later) on building my credit I had great credit midway and then it was terrible again. I realized I could not do anything without great credit and without my husband’s co-signing something which never feels good.
I want to have that they cant say no to me credit and when I was with my ex it was a hit and miss but being around militrary there was honestly no such thing as bad credit if you were married to someone in the military .he, of course, took care of majority of the bills and he would have wanted it all split down the middle I am assuming but after marriage to him and then being with someone where I paid all the bills and then getting in a relationshiop with someone who felt his ex-wife took advanatage of him he and I agreed to me taking small bills and he ended up changing this whole idea at a later time . I felt hat this is something that would be based on the couples there are some women out there that feel that 50/50 is a good idea I honestly just cant see myself doing this and not look at my partner like a room-mate I want to contrubute to a household but I do not want to be doing it solely when we had children I found myself working and paying for daycare and it got to a point where everything was pointless when I wanted to stay home with the kids he declined and I worked, saved and eventually left him .
With Money, these are questions that should be asked before moving in together much less before you are even married
How do you handle money?
Are you a spender or a saver?
Will you have separate checking accounts or a joint account?
What are your financial goals?
Are you expected to contribute equally to the household?
How will this change once you have children?