So now it’s a little after October 2021;
at this point, we stopped apartment hunting, and just a few days before I was to give my apartment notice on whether or not I was staying or if I was going, he tells me in a phone call over the phone in a very flippant way that I should get a one-bedroom apartment when I started to ask more questions about why and what was going on. He said that all of the no’s we were getting from the apartment complexes really bothered him, and we were all signs that we shouldn’t be living together; let’s pause here.
I was honest and I was also very transparent
in trying to explain to him how I have had to search for apartments the past few years I put an emphasis on the fact that we would have to find an apartment complex that accepted evictions he made the active decision to not listen to me in regards to that and not have this be his initial question before he filled out applications and they denied him. The fact that he received several no’s is because he did not do the due diligence and ask them if they accepted evictions I made a point in stating this to him, instead of him acknowledging this point The Sigma again placed the blame on me advise me that I was a liability to him and he did not think that this relationship should go further. At this point he was in North Carolina attending a funeral because his mother had recently passed due to COVID when he got back The Sigma came over to my home and was starting the process of the actual break
The Sigma
sat in his car and we talked more about why this was happening and how he was handling stress that was going on in the relationship. I advised him that instead of talking about it or communicating with me about how he feels he just decided to do this. Then he proceeded to cry in the car I was confused by the tears and I didn’t understand why he was shouting so I waited until he consoled himself and then asked him why he was crying. The sigma let me know that he didn’t really like who he was as a person The Sigma also advised that he didn’t really know who he was nor what he wanted out of life. He didn’t realize that it would be so much work to be in a relationship and didn’t think relationships needed to be this hard. I advise that I understood went on about our evenings and then I did something unspeakable I went back to his apartment and I stayed the entire night we talked more and at the end of the conversation what we decided to do was break up work on ourselves and the goal was to try to build friendship at this point then we can make that decision to come back together again. He decided that he would go back to therapy and The Sigma went to therapy for quite a while and it seemed like.
He was learning from the therapist and was taking those things and applying those to his life.
He asked me to purchase a few books that the therapist suggested I bought the books for him and we continue to talk to each other daily for about a couple of months during that time the conversations were always pleasant I was learning a lot more about him and we were adding activities that were fun into the mix as well as creating new memories and going out on dates we even went as far as attending Thanksgiving with his best friends.
All in all those two months allowed me to take a step back think about what I wanted how I want it to be loved how I can express that to him and for me to be patient allow him to do so and give him grace and time to do so. Not only did he show me a different side of him, the communication was terrific, he was on point with catering to my needs and he was also expressive. This break was one of the best ideas for our relationship.
