Vetting and Relationship “goals”

Everyone loves the looks of relationship goals but does anyone honestly understand that it actually means more than just matching outfits and taking cool vacation pics?
When I called off my marriage it took those that weren’t super close to me by surprise. on the outside, I had a super successful military husband we

had the perfect pair: son and daughter he gave me what ever I wanted and I honestly didn’t have to work if I didn’t want to . We seem like we vibed when we were out as a couple but truth be told I was miserable on the inside , I was suicidal, and I wasn’t mentally there through a huge chunk of our marriage . But we were goals right?

 

 

 

 

This will be a repeat of quotes lol
This is why vetting is important

I was married super young  (2 weeks before I graduated High school)

So, of course, my mindset wasn’t  to ask my future husband anything about his expectations of our marriage.

Marriage questions you can ask:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The questions

 

What do you expect from the marital partnership?
What is your perspective on marital roles?
How do you feel about balancing alone time, friend time, and couple time?
How do you divide household chores?

I know these are oddball questions to ask but honestly, they can be really helpful in taking a glance into a person’s thoughts and yes they can lie but honestly the smart thing to do when they lie and you catch them is leave and not stay . Especially if it is a deal breaker. I think having these discussions before can save you from a lot of issues later on down the road and also helps you decide what would be a deal breaker or not.

finding out if he is wanting to do 50/50 or all, If he is cooking and cleaning as well as you, and date night and having girls night how often? I know with me  I distanced myself from friends when I was involved with people in the past and then I found out that I lost a piece of myself as a year goes by.

DO NOT LOSE YOURSELF  IN A COUPLING

Check out Part 1 of the vetting series