Setting the Stage: The Unexpected Twist

As much as I tried to keep my calm, we managed to sit down and have a conversation about moving forward. Imagine my surprise – blindsided and already having left my previous apartment. I had no choice but to focus on rebuilding and saving. Thankfully, we qualified for a two-bedroom apartment and were granted a $2,500 voucher from the complex. I suggested using my portion of the rent from the voucher for the next 90 days, and we ironed out details like my move-out date and continuing to share groceries. We even set some boundaries, like no guests beyond us in our space. A simple enough boundary, or so I thought, and he agreed.

Navigating New Waters: Cooking vs. Buying

Time went on, and new conflicts arose. The cooking vs. buying food dilemma took center stage. I’d cook, he’d buy – a fresh topic for our arguments. The next three months loomed ahead, promising focused healing, but I sensed non-existence rather than renewal.

Facing Disappointment and Embracing Freedom

The realization hit hard – the last two and a half years seemed like a waste. Those promises he made? Empty. I knew it in my soul, my spirit confirming that I wasn’t always in the wrong. My heart ached, not only from disappointment but also from a newfound sense of freedom. I had been so convinced he was “the one,” but perhaps this was the universe telling me otherwise.

Confronting Unresolved Trauma and Self-Discovery

Dealing with his unresolved trauma was exhausting. He stood judgmental, lacking a true understanding of life, often acting superior to all. His career path was unsteady, more aided by women than by his own efforts. A leader he wasn’t, content with complacency. And my career? He had plenty to say, but his own actions didn’t match his words.

The Family Factor and Unmasking Reality

Wedding planning unveiled more cracks. His fear of no one showing up led to calling off the wedding. Could I marry a man who couldn’t express his anxieties? Each personal conflict, I handled alone. He spiraled even for the smallest issues. Doubt consumed me. Was this truly the partner I envisioned?

A Hesitant Future: Unveiling Unpreparedness

He wasn’t prepared to be a husband, a reality I had to face. Why did I say yes? Everything felt wrong. Not only did he overlook my children, but he also belittled their absence from our plans. And there he was, moving on mere days after our breakup, already entertaining another woman. 

Rebuilding Trust and Embracing Possibility

Trust shattered, the future seemed uncertain.  I questioned if I’d ever trust again.